Swine Flu and other stuff
Swine Flu
I don't know about you, but I'm seriously tired of hearing about the Swine Flu, or whatever they are deciding to call it now. They even made a dumb song out of it "Blame it on the Swine" a remix to "Blame it on the Alcohol".
Originally I would've like to have gotten it, but now I'm really sick of hearing about it.
I've decided to write about some of the other things that people have but noone is talking about.
Disinfectanttonsilitis - 10 New cases were reported overnight. People using disinfectants are reporting that their tonsils are becoming itchy and they are having a hard time swallowing. There are also reports of people complaining about their tongue turning blue after using these items. Not to worry though, drinking bleach removes the blue color from your tongue and stops the itchy throat.
Eargasms - With so many people worried about STD's these days, more and more people are turning to phone sex. Unfortunately there are some people that actually think by ejaculating into the phones receiver that the girl will be able to receive their sperm. It's also reported that phone sells are up by 15%. Coincidentally, the number of phone sex operators that swallow are up by 15%.
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In other news, Exxon Mobile is reporting that profits tumbled 58%. Boo Hoo. Good for them. Those bastards made enough money last year when gas prices hit and went over $4 a gallon.
Also thanks to the government bailouts that we are paying for Chrysler is filing for bankruptcy. The government has sunk about $25 billion in aid into Chrysler and rival General Motors Corp. Personally I don't think we as taxpayers should have to be responsible for their stupidity. If they are going to file bankruptcy they should have to give the money back that the government gave them before or after the filing. I still think that they are charging way too much for new and used vehicles. If they lowered all of the prices (and I'm not just talking about taking a couple hundred dollars off of the sticker price) more people would be likely to purchase a new vehicle.
Thats all I have for now, till next time spread the germs around and live alittle.
I don't know about you, but I'm seriously tired of hearing about the Swine Flu, or whatever they are deciding to call it now. They even made a dumb song out of it "Blame it on the Swine" a remix to "Blame it on the Alcohol".
Originally I would've like to have gotten it, but now I'm really sick of hearing about it.
I've decided to write about some of the other things that people have but noone is talking about.
Disinfectanttonsilitis - 10 New cases were reported overnight. People using disinfectants are reporting that their tonsils are becoming itchy and they are having a hard time swallowing. There are also reports of people complaining about their tongue turning blue after using these items. Not to worry though, drinking bleach removes the blue color from your tongue and stops the itchy throat.
Eargasms - With so many people worried about STD's these days, more and more people are turning to phone sex. Unfortunately there are some people that actually think by ejaculating into the phones receiver that the girl will be able to receive their sperm. It's also reported that phone sells are up by 15%. Coincidentally, the number of phone sex operators that swallow are up by 15%.
-----
In other news, Exxon Mobile is reporting that profits tumbled 58%. Boo Hoo. Good for them. Those bastards made enough money last year when gas prices hit and went over $4 a gallon.
Also thanks to the government bailouts that we are paying for Chrysler is filing for bankruptcy. The government has sunk about $25 billion in aid into Chrysler and rival General Motors Corp. Personally I don't think we as taxpayers should have to be responsible for their stupidity. If they are going to file bankruptcy they should have to give the money back that the government gave them before or after the filing. I still think that they are charging way too much for new and used vehicles. If they lowered all of the prices (and I'm not just talking about taking a couple hundred dollars off of the sticker price) more people would be likely to purchase a new vehicle.
Thats all I have for now, till next time spread the germs around and live alittle.
Labels: bailout, bankruptcy, Chrylser, Disinfecanttonsilitis, eargasms, Exxon Mobile, germs, government, Mexico, phone sex, profit, Swine Flu, taxpayer
posted by Justin at
6:32 PM
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